Daydream

Let it loose. Feel.

—

I didn't bother to listen because I knew, it's beyond my capability. And say, which words coming out from home-freak heads I could buy? You'd break. I'd break. We'd all break. Bunch of fragilities tying each other's knots like an idiot. Build a glass-house from shatters. And blood.

You all would fall, you fool.

Don't bother to promise. Don't bother to believe.

Don't even bother to take a minute, an hour, a day, a month to consider all of it at all.

Til you slowly crumble by yourself.

Til you have nothing more to tell. Til you have nothing more to prove. Til you have nothing more to embrace within you. Til you have nowhere to go. Til you have nothing. It's basically a null.

It's no longer between you and you. When you realize, you're no longer standing on your own feet. Your place now is no longer safe. All you want is to head home while you're being all doubtful. Hopping from this to that station, facing all the dead roses you're going to be sick about yet still crave for more the next day.

Endless loop. Welcome.

Sanctuary

--

The burnt castle I escaped was not the worst hell.

There, the heads of horror.. we are, home-freak, flying free to dwell in a limbo

where home is a mere state of mind.

The Red Coat of Popsicle

I'mma crush 'em.

Infinity of a Void

The Oubliette you fear of could be my Eden to breathe in and out. Would you let me in?

Abandoned Everything

Absorb Me Into Your Wave

So we can be as one.

Sailing to The Untouched You

Since kid, I always adore London, beside Tokyo, that I also love how the people there get themselves dressed. Their preferences influence me a lot on how I pick clothes to buy and to wear. The items and details are cute, I want to wear them all. And not too long ago, Yoins sent me a beret that I got as a gift again from them. I was so happy that I finally got this item in hand, so I could finally put this on my head and live the dream I was imagining. One problem tho, either my head apparently is too big or this beret is too small, it doesn't really form a circle in my head perfectly and I kind of have a hard time to put this on. But well, I guess that's all I have for now and I need to make it work. Oh yeah, still, for this look I kind of added a little bit twist from Japanese trend like heart-ring choker and igari makeup. What I want to say is, I currently am living one of my dream; being myself and expressing the soul inside with no boundaries because I can.

Combining Photography and Fashion Styling

This photo session was actually me and my friend's first trial of a real "photo session" like we would want this to look as close to professional but still speaks up our vibes, each vibes. Well, I only post mine in this page, for my friend's I took you can catch mine on Deviantart page. This was like very raw, I only wore my usual oversized sweater and my one and only short jeans at that time. More like, I showed you how my dance costume was like. I actually kind of regretted it back then after I checked all the pics that I wasn't very prepared. Yes, I wasn't, but well I could do much better on next session. 

Frankly speaking, it has always been the kind of thing I want to do since forever. Having me get dressed nicely with the outfits I pick by myself and take a photo or two of it. I always want to show this side of me. Maybe for some of you, you might have seen my previous photos on my social media account in which there's me posing with my outfits. At that time, I did that alone only with tripod and self-timer, so luckily this time I have somebody take the photos for me. Well, tho I think I still need to work more on the expression and all because it's damn awkward when there's somebody else seeing that gaze and some weird gesture of you in real life, like okay I need to chill and don't panic and just do it and forget it, I don't know haha. If only we could bring that kagebunshin to real life so I could take my own photos, oh but well I believe that we all can work on that, can't we? Now that we're progressing, that me and my friend have our own projects to do these media things including photography and dance filming, producing photos and dance videos, I could regularly stay in touch with my all accounts on the internet including this blog. Hope I could stay making these kind of projects forever while I'm earning money from them.

A Destination for Fashion Enthusiast

No, it's not taken from Shibuya, Japan. It's in Malioboro, Yogyakarta, Indonesia. They upgraded the pedestrian street with no motorcycle parking lot and now looking damn fabulous. You should definitely go and check yourself take many pics there, just because. As for me, I went there and wore my mom's old jacket and a skirt that I got as a gift from Shein. I don't know how to describe my style, lmao, it's like what it is. And I applied Igari makeup cause I really love Japanese style ever since. So yeah, this is me blending in the town.